The truth about me is not easy to find in a medical journal on over thousand pages after several years with mental illness and different mental diagnosis. They never seem to get me. But what if i am just normal daring to have meanings and put question on todays medical treatment. I got hospitalised the 15. March 2012 and was voulonterly hospitalised and my son and my brother drove me to the hospital. After beeing treated in psycosis of my son i got so relaxed and back to reality that i had 52 in rest pulse in the acute unit. I thought that the hospitalisation would last only for a few weeks as regular and that i got the medication i knew worked best on me. But the hospitalisation lasted for 2 1/2 year with 1 year and 3 months in a city far away from here. I am still a bit confused on all happening because i got so bad treatment. There was no nurse plan until i got back to my homeland and was hospitalised in a unit that took care of my basal needs and i got to exercise and do hiking. Nobody gets well of isolation and beeing held away from friends for over two years. When i got hospitalised in March 2012 i was fast put to a closed unit and under shielding. I was allowed to walk a litle bit out in the unit and i saw patiensts in huge suffering. And the nurses was more into themselves. They just sat there and did very litle. There was no hobbies or interests to do and people need to use theire resourses and grow theire interests to stay healthy and get well. There is nearly no healing enviroment in the psyciatric climate when there is only silence. There need to be a healthy dialogue and the unit needs to be held in a interiour based control that stimulates to healing. There cant be messed around with horror and disaster movies and crime books and not beeing cleaned good enough. There is danger for contamination with many people hospitalised together. Basal needs has to be taking care of. Some doctors think that peace and quiet and medication is the only way to heal patients. But the truth is that mostly everybody wants to have meaning and fun in theire lives. People like a good laugh. So i decided at the unit to role play. It is called psycodrama and is when you play a role to see how the healing gets. It is to take people in to a real situation and help them to interact or to be themselves and talk what they feel and the truth. I roleplayed as House MD. I did this as a sign on that something needed to be done. That the doctors and nurses needs to go a bit the extra way to heal theire patients. It seems like that if one medication works good on one patient they seem to put all the patients on the same medication. Psyciatris treatment is based on dialoge and observing but you cant get hold of a patiensts picture before you talk to them.
I desided to give it a go to be House MD because none of my behaviour forms seemed to work. To sit still in a room and be quiet the whole day is not normal for me. I am social and talk to people and i was scared going completly looney in my head. So i walked out in the unit limping and strong and talked american with a males voice. I had taken the role of House MD. I went in and saied helo to all the patients and they got a different picture on the day because nobody got scared, they laughed. One girl on 18 years old followed me around all the time laughing and wanting to be together with " House ", she did not know Norwegian good and talked for the most english, and she could relate to " House MD " i was talking about the enviroment and talking to patients and cleaning the unit for depressive videos, books and gave the flowers water and sat down talking to the girl about getting good health. I told the nurses what i thought about the unit and they sent me to shielding. I played House MD to them for some days, and got the same treatment as him hospitalised. I can laugh now, but beeing House MD was a cry for help. That the treatment needs to get better and that they cant give up patients. Beeing House MD i was all clear in my mind and a clever MD wanting the patients the best and having the will to go the extra way for them to get theire life back. Patients laughed a lot and that the nurses and the doctor did not. I was shilded for 7 months playing different caracters and beeing busy with that because i knew that they would not let me out, and i sat for the most alone writing and reading and talking to myself. I was not so very ill, i just needed my regular day routine and my son together with me and my family and friends. The truth is that i think the nurses thought i believed i was House MD and put it to my diagnose. I did not believe i was House MD i just played roleplay and saw that i met the same problems as he does in the television show. It was hard to see that nobody talked sense to me. They did not ask me questions : Why are you playing House MD ? They just drew a conclusion and shielded me for days. I sat in totally isolation and i dont understand how people think in the health system that they can read minds and think that they can get the right story on the psyciatric symptomes by not talking to a patients. To treat mentall ill people is to accept them for all that they are, theire values, theire personality and theire flaws and wrongs. People are so scared of doing worngs that they end up wanting to live a perfect life, and that dont leads to happiness. When you are capable to laugh at youreself and know that you are a living humanbeeing with dynamical emotions that leads to the way you want to take in life you get cured. The perfect life is an illusion. People think 70 000 thoughts a day and it is possible with cognitive behaviour therapy to train thoughts so they support youre quality of life and leads you to happiness. People are not perfect and House MD is just a role caracter but it is recommended at the medical school educating doctors in Germany to see the show. To be House MD i discovered that the nurses and the doctor had no sence of humour and i was getting the same problems as he did with people. So the best part in life is to play youre own role. To be youreself because there is only one of you. Accept youre life and youre flaws and mistakes to lead you to a richer more healthy person that manage life and that is good enough. You dont need to be youre best all the time. And there is people that understand you no matter what. But for me the health care system did not understand why House MD was occuring as a person for role playing in my mind. It was a token on that the psyciatric unit was to bad and did not know how to treat people. I have heared many stories from former patients on the unit and they are not happy with the treatment. It is sad because there is enough skills to develope a good nursing for mentall ill people and so for physical ill people. People do get ill once in a while and i have told people : " Dont be scared of beeing you because every single person on earth needs a doctor once in a while. " We are humans not a role caracter so after a while i put House MD away because i needed to be me again. And beeing me again have lead me to work as a nurse again. A bit different, but totally normal with the passion for mentall ill people that it is 100 % possible to get well. There is by law and education to keeping the hope for patients no matter what. There is always hope as long as you live. So bee youreself and try to focus on the humouruous side of the world. Because people are funnier and stranger than you thing. If you live by the law and know it you have freedom to bee you. In all that you are and stay kind and love is my best advice, because when people relates to you as a good person miracles do happen, but to people you dont like or hold youreself away from, take a closer look and care, because it can be youre best friend ever because all in all the most common thing in the psyciatric treatment is that it is pretty new and they make mistakes. I have a project going on and that is to read my journal and make it a novel project to see the reality in bad and good treatment and how they diagnose by not asking questions and together with my journal there will be my own truth and what really happened. Nobody has done this before and todays society should know about psyciatric treatment because depression and other mental problems is rising to be the most common illness in 2020 by WHO. If the regular man knows how to treat psyciatric problems and know that there always is kindness and hope millions will be cured. Because we often live in an illusion believing that we are not good enough, but we are. Having a mental illness or no mental illness. Because do we really know what is normal. I find Hous MD as a strong caracter and a normal person and a very good doctor. Hope you have a good time, and remember to laugh there is people working with a passion that there is alway meaning in life and that it is possible beeing cured no matter what youre problems are. It is a nurses job to believe the impossible can be done by keeping the realism in the basic prosedures and to give love, care and sometimes a hug. Life is presious and we all want to live a good happy life and it is a human right. Talk to people and ask questions, you will be surpised that people are mostly honest and have problems in theire lives. You are never alone in this world, so dont give up before you have someone understanding you. Be loved because there is people loving the whole world and i am one of them. With or whitout House MD ;-)
" Surprises can come everyday to you and the person giving you the best gifts of life is the Lord above - stay in the run always - there is always humour in this world. "
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