When It Hurts

Sometimes everything hurts. I have it like this now. It seems like my future goes in to medications that drains me out and make me to a bag of tiredness. I suffer a lot in the mornings, and it is far away from the wivvid girl with stamina that celebrated every coming new day. I dont understand how the doctor think. I am to much medicated and suffer a lot. Once in my life i went out running in the mornings with my dog, and now i can hardly walk. It scares me how the doctors think and how many people that goes away from you when you suffer from a mental illness. You end up nearly alone.
I wish and pray that society could do something. The treatment is to bad and i dont know how long i last in this feelings. It is no life.
Dreams is still there for art school and a life in joy, but it seems like million miles away. To end up like this is hard and people seem like they only want the perfect life. They dont want to bother with us with mental issues even though how kind we are. And i meet only kind people. I cried yeasterday and the only one talking to me and wanting to save my life was a fellow patient. So what do the people work in the units do ? Patients should be signed out when they work better than the nurses. I dont understand the system. I hope i get a better day. But it seems like my life is headed to a lot of suffering. I still dream on praying that somebeody one day understands that medication is not the sollution it take away all quality and joy of life. Take care of youreself and hope you never get mentall problems. Live all you can, because it might be to late one day. stay with friends that loves you and care for them. I hope my situation turns. And will be back for more later.